Belief
by Isilarma
Summary: Nobody can save everybody, but that doesn't make it any easier. When Helga loses faith in herself after the death of a young patient, Salazar takes it upon himself to help her. Things don't go quite according to plan. Part of the Tales of the Founders series.


**Belief**

**Isilarma**

**Written for the Song Shuffle Contest (Belief) and the HP Potions Competition (Burn-Healing Paste). A slightly random idea set before anyone even mentioned starting Hogwarts. I hope you all enjoy it.**

**By the way, I've added a timeline for all my Founders stories to my profile, so hopefully that will make it easier to see where they all fit together.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and am not affiliated with Bloomsbury of Scholastic Inc.**

* * *

"You said she would live!"

The shout echoed down the corridor. Salazar's eyes narrowed as he looked up from his book. He and Helga had been attempting to help a village struck by a new sickness, but even their abilities were not enough to save everyone.

"We thought you were the best. Why couldn't you save her?"

Salazar grabbed his staff and pushed himself to his feet. While he understood the man's distress, there was no need to take it out on Helga. She would be blaming herself enough as it was, never mind that she had done all she could. The man's voice sounded again, too low for Salazar to make out the words, but the tone alone was enough to make him quicken his steps. He knew the lengths to which grief could drive someone, and he doubted Helga would even try to defend herself.

Before he could take more than three steps though, the door was thrown open. A tall man with long blonde hair came storming out, almost knocking Salazar over in the process. Salazar opened his mouth, but the words died as he saw the tears in his eyes. Instead, he moved to the door and looked inside.

Helga was standing by the window, and even from where he was Salazar could see her shoulders shaking. He found himself wishing Godric was there; Dark wizards he could handle, but crying females were another matter entirely. Even as he hesitated though, Helga let out a sob and he could no longer suppress his concern.

"Helga."

Helga started. "Salazar." She rubbed her eyes and turned to him. "Is everything all right?"

"That was going to be my question."

She forced a smile. "I am fine, thank you."

Salazar studied her, taking in her red eyes and pale face. "No, you are not. I heard him."

Helga's shoulders slumped. "He was upset-"

"That does not give him the right to talk to you like that."

"Salazar, his daughter just died. He has every right to be angry with me."

Salazar frowned and moved further into the room. "Did you do everything you could?"

"Of course, but-"

"Then there is no but. You did all you could to help her. Nobody could ask more than that."

"But it wasn't enough." Her voice broke and she looked away. "I couldn't save her, just like I couldn't save all the others."

"But what about all those you have saved?" Salazar argued. "Half the people walking around out there would be dead if not for you."

Helga just shook her head. "She was six years old, Salazar," she whispered. "She shouldn't have died today."

Salazar was really wishing that Godric and Rowena hadn't chosen today to go and search Rowena's family library for a cure. "You know that this illness affects children more badly than adults," he said. "No one could have done more than you did."

For a long moment, he didn't think she would answer. "I should have done more." She was staring at her hands, and Salazar felt a sudden rush of understanding.

"It didn't work?"

"I couldn't control it." The admission was little more than a whisper.

"Helga, you're exhausted, you have been for days."

"So are you."

"But I'm used to it. Besides, your talent takes far more energy than brewing a potion does."

"Or maybe I'm just weaker."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"But it's true." She closed her eyes, but tears continued to fall. "I am supposed to be able to save lives, yet I keep failing, and people keep dying. I don't know what to do."

Salazar shifted, at a loss as to what to say. Helga's gift of healing was a blessing, yet like all blessings, it came with a price. Nobody could save everybody, and the lives she did save did nothing to assuage her grief over those she could not. None of them blamed her; they all knew what it was like to wield great power, and Helga had had less time than any of them to learn how to use hers. Salazar had no doubt that she would master it in time, but it seemed that she did not feel the same way.

"You will learn," he said quietly. "Helga, it took me years to master the storms, and even now I still lose control sometimes. Already you have improved a great deal. It will just take some time."

"Time," she echoed. "Time during which more people will die."

Salazar sighed. "You cannot save everyone, Helga." He hesitated a moment, then laid a hand on her arm. "Please do not give up. You are stronger than you think."

Helga just gave a wan smile. "Kind words," she murmured. "If misguided." She squeezed his hand briefly and stepped away. "I must return to my patients."

Salazar opened his mouth to argue, then closed it again as he realised he had no idea what to say. He had always prided himself on his quick tongue, but all his eloquence seemed to have deserted him. Helga often seemed to have that effect, and he could only watch helplessly as her slim figure disappeared through the door. Where was Godric when you needed him?

He stood there for several minutes before giving himself a mental shake. There was nothing he could do to help Helga, but he might be able to do something about their patients. After what had just happened, he had no desire to lose anyone else. Slowly, Salazar began to make his way down to the small room that had been set aside for his brewing, but even as he started to run through new possibilities, he couldn't prevent his mind drifting to the blonde witch in the infirmary. For once in his life, he had no idea what to do. He scowled a dull pain started in his temples. Witches were too confusing.

In response, Salazar threw himself into his brewing. The disease itself had originally appeared to be an old one, but the occurrence of several novel symptoms had quickly proved that it had developed, hence Rowena's need to check her books for some ideas. Helga had continued to do what she could for their patients while Salazar set to work on developing a new cure. Many of the old remedies had proven ineffective against this new strain, and they had to stop it before it spread further. Not for the first time, Salazar found himself feeling grateful for his old potions master. The man might have been a malicious bastard, and his methods downright sadistic, but he had known what he was talking about. Already Salazar had made progress, and that combined with Helga's knowledge meant that they were very close to discovering a cure.

So engrossed was he in his work, that the next few hours seemed to fly by. By that time though, Salazar's enthusiasm for the project had dimmed considerably, and the formerly minor ache now felt like someone was driving a spike into his skull. He had given his stock of Pain-Relieving Potions to Helga, and while he didn't exactly regret it, it did make life more difficult. He forced the pain aside in favour of studying the potion in front of him. It wouldn't be able to prevent the disease from spreading, but it would hopefully help to relieve some of the symptoms. His vision blurred and he had to lean against the desk for a moment. For now, it would have to do.

As he began gathering his unused ingredients, Salazar found himself again wondering what to do about Helga. Words were clearly doing no good; he doubted even Rowena would be able to help in her current mood. Salazar scowled; he knew Helga was stronger than she realised, but she had barely any self-confidence. Not entirely surprising considering her past, but still incredibly infuriating. There had to be some way of showing her how good she was, but Salazar was at a loss as to what that could be.

Unfortunately, a potions workshop was probably the worst place in the world to be distracted. Lost in thought as he was, Salazar failed to notice that some of the flagstones were raised and uneven. His staff caught on a particularly rough edge, causing him to stumble into a desk. The impact sent some of his earlier experiments rolling off the side. A moment later, they hit the floor, splattering their contents in every direction. Salazar grunted, the noise had not exactly helped his headache, and Vanished the mess with a wave of his wand. It was only when he turned back that he noticed that not all the spillages had been on the floor.

That particular solution plus firebush seeds plus flames... Salazar did not need his old master to tell him that that was a very volatile mixture. Two thoughts flashed through his mind. The first was that he should really put a shield up. The second... Helga's tear-stained face appeared before him. A slight smile twitched at his lips, just as the mixture ignited.

Salazar had expected it to be violent, but even he was taken by surprise by the force of the reaction. The explosion blasted him completely off his feet, and he barely had time to twist in an attempt to shield his head before he hit the wall with a sickening thud. Pain exploded in his body, and he couldn't hold back a strangled cry as he slid to the floor. For a moment, all he could do was lie there, completely stunned by the impact. Then the pain made itself known, and it was all he could do to stay conscious.

Through the ringing in his ears, Salazar was just able to make out shouts and running footsteps. He attempted to lift his head, but his body refused to cooperate; the world spun before his eyes, and it took all his considerable willpower to keep from throwing up. Desperately, he tried to take a deep breath, but fierce stabbing pains in his chest convinced him that that was a very bad idea. The agony continued to build, and Salazar felt a sudden rush of fear. He had had ribs broken before, but it had never felt like this. His leg screamed at him and that he ignored with with the ease of long practice, but answering pains from his am and back were less easily pushed aside. Through a haze of pain, he realised there was blood on the floor. Maybe this had not been the best idea after all. Darkness began to creep in at the edges of his vision.

"Salazar!"

He recognised that voice, but he was too tired to keep his eyes open.

"Salazar, don't you dare pass out."

Helga, he realised suddenly. That was good. That meant he would survive.

"Please, open your eyes."

She sounded like she was crying. Salazar could never bear to hear her cry. With an enormous effort he forced his eyes open.

"Not...dead...yet..." The words ended in a moan as his ribs protested, but he heard Helga's gasp of relief.

"Salazar!" Relief was immediately replaced by concern. "Don't move, I think you have internal injuries."

Salazar didn't waste energy agreeing. Instead he concentrated on staying conscious, and not going into a panic attack over the fact that his vision was too blurry to make out any details. He could hear Helga running diagnostic spells, and from the tension in her voice, the results were not what she had hoped for.

"Oh my..."

Salazar closed his eyes for a moment to gather his strength. "What?" It was a struggle to get even that little out.

"Broken bones I can handle, but there is so much bleeding..."

Salazar understood. Helga's studies were progressing at an incredible rate, but there were some things that she just did not have the experience to deal with. Or not conventionally at any rate.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Salazar locked his gaze on hers. "Try...heal..." The words were broken, and barely audible, but Helga understood.

"I can't. It might not work, or even make things worse."

"Won't. You can..."

"Don't try to talk," Helga pleaded, but Salazar ignored her. This was too important, and not just for him.

"Try. Will work."

"But Salazar-"

Salazar never got the chance to hear her protests. That last effort proved to be the last straw for his battered body, and he didn't have the strength to hold back the darkness any more. He was faintly aware of Helga shouting his name, as pain overwhelmed him. There was a sudden heat in his chest, and then Salazar knew no more.

* * *

"Salazar, wake up."

Salazar's eyes flickered open, and he found himself lying in a soft bed. He was apparently in one of the guest rooms, but all thoughts of his surroundings flew out of his head as he found himself staring into Helga's blue eyes.

"Told you." The most he could manage was a whisper, but Helga beamed at him.

"Salazar!" She looked like she wanted to hug him, and Salazar was very glad when she refrained from doing so. "How are you feeling?"

At her words, all his various injuries made their presence known, and Salazar had to bite back a gasp. There were no stabbing pains in his chest though, and it was an enormous relief to be able to take a deep breath again. His leg had seized up, but that was such a regular occurrence that it barely registered alongside the rest. He turned his head to one side, and was relieved when the motion elicited only a faint twinge.

"Much better, thank you."

"Thank God. There was so much damage..." Abruptly her concern changed. "What did you think you were doing?"

Salazar winced. "My apologies. I did not mean to alarm you."

"Of course I was going to be alarmed! What happened?"

Salazar attempted a shrug, then stopped when his shoulder protested rather vigorously. "There was an accident. It doesn't matter."

"How can it not matter? You almost died."

"But I didn't," he pointed out. "Thanks to you."

She shook her head. "If I had arrived just a few minutes later-"

"But you didn't," he repeated gently. "So why worry about it?"

Helga bit her lip. "If things has been different..." She paused and took a deep breath. "I was so worried. I didn't think it was going to work."

Salazar smiled. "I did."

"But how? Nobody else did."

Salazar shook his head, being very careful not to move too quickly. "Because I believe in you," he said simply. "I know what you can do. And I am not the only one. I know Godric and Rowena both feel the same way."

Helga's expression darkened. "But I failed. Just look at this morning."

"Helga, we have all failed at times. That does not mean we will always fail. We recognise our mistakes, and we learn from them so that they don't happen again." His voice softened. "Just as you did today."

Helga continued to stare at him and he looked away, suddenly embarrassed by his words. He meant every one of them, but he was very well aware that he did not have the gentlest of reputations. He glanced out the window, and was startled to see that it was dark outside. He had been unconscious far longer than he had thought. Salazar suddenly realised that Godric and Rowena would be back soon, and suppressed a groan. Godric was going to kill him when he heard about this.

"Do you really think so?"

Salazar glanced back, and was alarmed to see tears in her eyes. Why did people always have to cry? He forced himself to concentrate. "Of course I do. This is hardly the first time you have saved my life, and Godric owes you just as much. You have an incredible gift, and it will only become stronger with time."

Helga's eyes met his, and he was careful not to look away. Let her see his sincerity, let her know that he was telling the truth.

"You need to have more faith in yourself," he said quietly.

Helga nodded. "So I have been told." She sighed and looked away. "I do not find it as easy as the rest of you."

Salazar smiled at her. "We will have to work on that." He yawned, then grimaced as his chest protested the movement. Helga, of course, noticed.

"You should get some rest," she said. "You still have a lot of healing to do."

Salazar nodded and settled back into the pillows. Normally he would protest, but he really was aching all over. Besides, Helga needed some peace. "Thank you."

She squeezed his hand briefly. "I think I should be the one thanking you."

Salazar opened his eyes to stare at her. "What for?"

She just smiled. "You know what." She leaned over and pressed a light kiss to his forehead. Salazar felt a wave of warmth, and before he could protest he was fast asleep.

* * *

"I can't leave you alone for a single day, can I?"

Salazar cracked one eye open. "You're not supposed to wake sleeping patients."

Godric was not amused. "Only you could nearly get yourself killed in an infirmary."

"I wasn't in the infirmary at the time," Salazar muttered. He opened his other eye and tried to sit up, only to bite back a curse as his ribs started throbbing again. He wasn't at all surprised to find Godric's hand at his back, supporting him until he was able to lean back more comfortably.

"Easy. Helga only just changed your bandages."

"I am not an invalid," Salazar muttered. He frowned as Godric's words registered. "Bandages?"

Godric raised an eyebrow. "The bandages covering the places where Helga had to dig shards of cauldron out of you."

Salazar stared down at his wrapped torso. "Oh." He had been so preoccupied with his ribs and head that he had barely registered his other injuries.

"She also had to mend your broken ribs, stop your internal bleeding and set your shoulder."

Sure enough, one of his arms was immobilised. "How am I supposed to brew like this?"

Godric's eyes darkened. "Don't you dare joke about this, Salazar."

Salazar looked down. "My apologies."

He heard a sigh, and then a hand rested on his uninjured shoulder. "You almost died, you idiot. Do you have any idea how worried Rowena and I were when Helga told us?" Salazar shifted uncomfortably, but Godric wasn't finished. "And Helga... Even she was surprised you survived."

"She shouldn't have been. I wasn't."

Godric's eyes narrowed. "How exactly did this happen anyway?"

"Is this really necessary?"

"It is if you want to be anywhere near a potions lab in the next year."

Salazar glared at him. "I am not a child, Godric!"

"Then tell me what happened."

Salazar scowled, but he knew Godric would have no qualms about carrying out his threat. "I was distracted. I knocked over a cauldron; it mixed with the wrong things and exploded. That is it."

Godric's expression didn't change. "I see."

Salazar forced himself not to twitch under that scrutiny. Fortunately, he had had plenty of practice. "Accidents happen, Godric."

"Not to you, they don't."

Salazar shook his head. "What are you saying, that I did this on purpose?"

"Not on purpose, no. I have no doubt that you were distracted considering your chat with Helga earlier."

"She does need more confidence in herself," Salazar muttered.

Godric raised an eyebrow. "I am also curious as to how you can raise shields in a split-second in a duel, yet fail to do so in your lab."

Salazar shrugged. "I had a headache, and I had given Helga all my potions. Working for four hours straight also dulls the reflexes a little." He sighed. "Godric, I am fine and Helga is fine. What exactly is the problem?"

Godric held his gaze long enough that Salazar was just starting to feel uneasy, but eventually he nodded. "Very well." His expression softened. "Are you all right?"

"Sore," Salazar admitted. "But I will be fine. She did a good job."

Godric nodded. "Indeed she did." He gave Salazar a considering look. "She tells me you have a great deal of faith in her."

"And you don't?" He gave a small smile. "I told her that she was stronger than she thought. She proved me right."

And now that she had done so, how much further would she go? Salazar had no doubt that they would all be surprised by the answer.

* * *

***scratches head*** **I'm not entirely sure where that came from, or if I'm completely happy with it. What does everyone think?**


End file.
